Oh.... Hi Guys

I think it's this time every year that I get this weird urge to blog, which is kind of funny because it means I could blog for months afterwards, or you won't hear from me again for another year... or three. Who knows. I had 10 comments waiting for moderation, they were all spam. Cool beans. I guess it's been awhile guys.

I think I've changed a lot since the last time I've posted on this blog. A lot of stuff has happened, good and bad.

I miss these kids like you wouldn't believe.

The biggest would have to be my trip Uganda. I think I might have mentioned that I was planning it before I stopped posting, or at least hoping to visit. Well, it happened. How was it? It changed my life, but not in the way that I thought it might.

For some reason before I left I had this big idea that I would go and meet a bunch of new people (which I did) and instantly become an awesome person, and know exactly what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

Haha, big surprise, that didn't happen. Aside from the fact that no one is perfect, even the road towards being so is long, not a quick 3 week whirlwind. Uganda did change me though. I went to step (or drastically leap) out of my comfort zone, and it gave me the courage to continually step outside of that comfort zone since I've been back. Job interviews stopped making me nervous. If I can fly half way across the world and live in a completely different culture for 3 weeks all by myself, then I can chat with the owner of a cafe and convince them that they want to hire me.

Apparently I did a pretty good job of it too. I'm working two jobs now. I'm bussing tables at a bakery and cafe. It can be fun. It can make me want to hit someone, but I'm happy there. The customers make me lose hope in humanity by their stupidity, then remind me to keep believing in them when they slip me a five-spot and tell me I gave them outstanding service.

I'm also a Sales Associate at Gymboree. A kids clothing store. I love this job even more. The kids crack me up, my co-workers are awesome, and I've realized it is possible to go clothes shopping without completely ripping a store apart looking for what you want. Really people, it may be my job to refold the stack of shirts, but I can assure you, I have other things to do.

I've lost some people, and I've made new friends. 

My brother is no longer living at home, and I've taken this change harder then I ever thought I would. I haven't exactly "lost" him, but he's not exactly there for me anymore. We haven't always been the best of friends, but I don't feel right not having him around the house when I get home. He made me maddest I've ever been in my life, but he could also make me laugh when nothing else could. His leaving was unexpected, and caused a lot of drama within the family. I'm still trying to forgive him for that, but I miss him more than anything.

I have Uganda to thank for the new friends. I learned to simply relax around people I didn't know, and to be myself. That strangers weren't going to kill me, and that I might actually enjoy hanging out with some of them. It made me realize life is better if you smile and wave to the people who pass you by every day. Your world is brightened, and you just might meet someone who makes a big difference in your life. (I actually haven't made a new friend by just waving at a random person, but it could still happen, right?)

So anyways, I guess I'm done rambling now. I may be back later, maybe not. Either way, glad I stopped in to say hey. Hope ya'll are learning as much as I have been.

What About Now?

I don't remember the last time someone asked me what I was going to do with my life. Aside from myself of course, because if it came down to that, the answer every time would be, five minutes ago.

You remember when we graduated highschool and it was the only thing anyone could talk to you about? What comes next? What amazing talents does this generation have to share with the world? We've given you our everything, now what will you give us?

A year and a half later, they've stopped asking. I guess they got tired of hearing the one answer I could consistently give. I really don't know. What a disappointment.

With another one of those awesome birthdays we all looked forward to from the ages of three to eighteen fast approaching, it's been on my mind a lot lately. What now? Actually, not as much that as, why haven't I done it yet?

The world has been sending me mixed messages. One minute I'm being told that I'm young, now is my chance to do the things I've always dreamed of doing. Now is the chance to see the places I've never thought I'd get the chance to see. "Why not?", is the only question they have for me, when I tell them I can't just leave. Oh, you know,

Family.

Friends.

A job.

People. Mostly people. I can't walk out on them.

"Yeah, that's what held me back too. Don't make the same mistake."

Minute number two has other things to say. Most of them directly contradicting with Minute One, yet explaining to me that Minute One is right. Now is my chance. Wait, what?

My chance for what exactly? I still haven't figured that out.

Have I mentioned Minute Two doesn't make a whole lot of sense?

I work at Safeway. I'm a courtesy clerk, which is a nice way of saying, I bag peoples grocery's, and push carts. My co-workers are awesome.

I've lost count of how many of them have told me to find another job. One of them reminds me rather frequently. "Find something you enjoy doing, because if you can go far here, you'll do even better while you're happy."

I was talking to a friend of mine awhile ago about all of this, and she smiled and said, "it's like a real live coming of age story."

Right, only, where's the climax? At what point do I get hit on the head and come to with the knowledge of everything I've always wanted, and how to achieve it? At one point does everything boil down to the one moment that changes it all?

I guess I know my problem. I've been listening to the world to much. Thinking they're the ones I'm meant to please. Forgetting Who really matters, cause in the end, He's the one I'll be spending eternity with... gosh, and I thought, "the rest of my life" sounded like a long time.

Introducing The Way We Love

October. It's that crazy month where all the writers begin to realize NaNoWriMo is only four weeks away, and they better come up with some kind of plot if they want to make it to 50k. After being interviewed by an honest to goodness newspaper man on the subject, I was forced to decide what I would be writing this year. As a spur of the moment choice, my beloved characters of old won out.

I'll be torturing Grant, Luna, Ranen, and Weston for another year, at least. They'll be returning in The Way We Love, sequel to The Way We Think.

Since making that decision, I've been totally stoked about NaNo. I've even started outlining. Who cares if I've only got a few weeks and I'm just now on the first chapter.

So, who's doing NaNoWriMo? Keep checking back because Beautiful People will be geared towards NaNoers this month. Don't worry if you aren't planning on undertaking the craziness of the challenge, we'll have plenty of questions for you as well!

Life Has a Pattern

I've noticed events in my life tend to take on a pattern. Luckily it's an easy one. Everything seems to happen at once, and then nothing happens at all for a day, or three, and then everything happens at once again. As exhausting as it sounds, I like it.

The play is finished now. The cast party was a mixture of sad and happy. Saying goodbye to some people I knew I wouldn't see for a while, but enjoying getting together to just hang out for once, instead of having to worry about rehearsals. Epic water fights ensued. Future plays were discussed. Awesomeness abounded.

The next day I executed a plan I had been working on for exactly one week. A surprise birthday party for my dear Fin. She turned 18. Aside from showing up ten minutes late, the plan worked flawlessly. You can read about it HERE.

I've finally reached my few days of rest, which means I had time to read Owl City's latest blog post. Strange, I hadn't realized just how much of an introvert I really am. If you ever have trouble understanding me and my ways, please use this post as a guide line. It fits me perfectly.

For those wondering how my writing is going, the amazing, wonderful, unbelievable Sky finished editing The Way We Think the other day. I have not sent it in for my free proof copy from CreateSpace. Just didn't have the time. As for other writings I haven't been doing anything serious. I keep telling myself as soon as things settle down I need to work on the outline for Ash Valley, but maybe I just need to get myself to do it now.

Even now I can see more of life's events piling up in my future. Some are new, some are exciting, I'm praying all of them will be approached with my heart in Christ Jesus.

I leave you with this video. It has absolutely nothing to do with this post, but it does have Dick Van Dyke.

Goal Achieved

I finished the second draft of The Way We Think today. My NaNoWriMo novel of 2010. 75,328 words.

I'll be honest and say I'm not as happy with it as I could be. I really don't think I'll ever be 100% satisfied with it. I knew it wouldn't end with draft two when I started draft one, but I'm beginning to understand what people mean when they say the re-writing, and editing never really ends.

That being said, this step is rather exciting for me as it's the furthest I've managed to make it with any of my novels. It's a place I've never been to. A place I'm learning from, as I have from every new step I've made in my writing.

It's a milestone and for the next week I can enjoy this. Then it'll be back to fretting over how I'm going to get this character out of that, phrase those words so they sound just right, and asking Finn "does that sound cliche?"

In Which Georgie Remembers Why She Wants to Direct Film

Just when you think the world has truly gone under and turned their back on God. Just when you think there is nothing humanly possible to help those around you. Just when everything looks completely and utterly lost, you find things like this.

The fact that Carrie Underwood even chose to sing this song surprises me (albeit in a rather... interesting choice of dress). It makes me wonder who will watch this and listen to those words? Who will close the page as soon as they hear the first line? Who in the audience was listening to the message of how great Thou art? Did she realize she could affect hundreds, if not thousands of people by singing this? Did she realize that children are watching her, looking up to her, waiting for her next move?

I just finished reading a book called Harry & Frodo: Understanding Visual Media and its Impact on Our Lives. While rather redundant, it did make clear to me once again, just how much media has an impact on our lives. It affects us more than most people would think. With this renewed realization, I was reminded why I want to make movies. Why I want to make good movies. So much could be accomplished in that field. So many people reached. It doesn't even have to have blaring Christian themes. Just a movie with good morals would be nice for once. With a hero that you can learn from.

Then again, it's not that easy to get yourself in a position to be that kind of an influence. Even if I were to get the money to make a movie, it doesn't mean anyone would watch it. I've told myself this a thousand times, and yet I keep hearing a little voice out of nowhere, "but what if they did?"

I'd like to think Carrie Underwood's standing ovation was due to the fact that she was willing to stand on that stage and sing about a God who has been rejected by society, not just because she sang it like a... well... country star. I believe this youtube video can change lives, if that's the plan God has for it. I believe a film about a person with the faith of a mustard seed, would make an impact on someone out there, and in the end, if it brought just one person a step closer to Christ, my goal will have been reached.

In Which Georgie Discovers The Day of the Week

I used to wonder how on earth someone could not know what day of the week it was.

"Is this Tuesday, or Wednesday?"

I would look at them skeptically and wonder why you would even need to ask that question. Did you completely skip Tuesday? Did you just return from time travel, unsure how much time you spent away? Yesterday was Tuesday. Tomorrow's Thursday. Duh, it's Wednesday.

Then, of course, I always heard people saying the only way they could remember what day it was, was by thinking of the things that were happening that week. Grandma's denture fitting on Monday. Ferdinand's didgeridoo recital on Tuesday. Clementine's initiation into Knit's of the Round Table on Wednesday. On and on.

Things have changed since then though. All week I've been confused as to what day it was. Actually, I even got May and July mixed up. I'm pretty sure the only reason I know what month it is, is due to the fact that I've been writing a screenplay. That's got to mean ScriptFrenzy, and SF takes place in April.

Speaking of ScriptFrenzy, Sam and I have reached 84 pages. Since we've run out of plot, things have kind of been rambling along. Interesting tid-bits we weren't expecting popping up here and there. We have no idea where this whole thing is going, but we do know we only have 16 pages left of the challenge. We also know The Romantic Plot Trasher will not be winning any Academy awards.

Anyway, here I am. Only knowing what day tomorrow is because I get to go in and find out about that wonderful thing where dentists rip the big kid teeth that are supposed to give you wisdom from your head. Duh, tomorrow's Thursday. Oh... wait.

God Given Style

Everyone has different ways of developing and writing their novels. That's just the way we are as humans. God installed something in writers that makes their heart sing when they were supposed to be asleep four hours ago, but stayed up to finish a scene they just couldn't wait to get down. He thought it best not to add that feature to others... goes to prove God truly does know best.

So, we've established that God made writers, and a whole bunch of other people. He didn't stop there though. Within the group of writers He decided to give them each their own style and method. He gave them character. Set one apart from the other.

The fun thing here is that He didn't tell them from the beginning what that style was. He let them grow, learn, and discover for themselves, and, well, the fact of the matter is... I'm still in the discovery stage. I think a lot of people still are and don't even realize it.

If you're unsure what stage you're at, read the following quotes that are rather popular among the "believing they've discovered" stage. If you've ever said, or thought any of them, read on.

"I've only ever written one genre. I don't have to try others, I already know this one is my style."

"I write all my novels the same way. I don't have to try anything different. My method works perfectly."

"I always have a female/male main character. It's just what I know best."

Oh dear. Oh my. I know these sayings so well because I've heard them in so many places, including coming from my own mouth. In the last year, I've learned differently. It started back when I began to realize writing was more then just a small hobby for me. It was something bigger.

I read books on writing. I read blogs on writing, and I continued to write myself. As I found myself writing more and more, I was inspired to try new concepts, new characters, and even new genre's.

Where as before I had remained with fantasy and only fantasy, I discovered historical fiction and sci-fi. My main characters were all girls. Now the role of MC varies so much, it's hard to say which gender I use more often. I once told myself a novel required no planning, or outlining. I'd heard so often that the characters will write the story for you, if you just give them the chance (which I do believe is true, to an extent). What I now consider to be my best novel was around nine months in the planning before I began to write.

I would still return to fantasy as my main genre, but now I've tried something different. I know that out of the genre's I've tried, fantasy will always be home. For now.

I encourage you to branch out and discover. God knows your style, but He can't prove to you what it is if you refuse to try it. I once thought writing couldn't become any more fun. I was wrong. I once thought I couldn't do anything else with my writing. I was wrong. I'm willing to bet you may be wrong as well.

When do you stop searching though? This could go on forever, and I believe it should. You can always learn new things, but only if you're willing to step out from your comfort zone of fantasy and try something new. I doubt I'll ever be done with this hunt. That would leave no room for development, and no matter how good my writing may get, it can always be better.

Then again, God made me just a little different then all the other writers out there. Maybe I'm the only one on this road of discovery. God gave me a style... He gave you a style. Do you know what it is?

Favorites of 2010 - Books

My dear blogging friend, Tarissa, from In The Bookcase, listed her favorite books she read last year and invited others to do the same. It sounded fun to me, so here goes.

I've read a total of 34 books in 2010. Rather sad, even more so compared to the 62 I read in 2009. Anyway, my favorites...

1. Blood Red Horse by K. M. Grant. Ever since I read this book it's been a favorite of mine. The crusades, horses, the slightest touch of romance. I love it.

2. The Eagle of the Ninth by Rosemary Sutcliff. Set in Roman Britain, packed with history and suspense. Written by one of my seester's favorite authors, I've been meaning to read more of her novels.

3. Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis. I've heard this book was confusing, I've heard it made perfect sense. I've heard people put it down, I've heard it praised to the skies. So, I read it. It was amazing. I would recommend it to anyone. Honestly.

4. Tuck by Steven Lawhead. The third book in the King Raven trilogy was most certainly the best. If you haven't read the King Raven series, and you're into Robin Hood as much as I am, you need to.

5. White by Ted Dekker. Another third book. Second only to Black in my opinion, however I read Black in '09. Ted Dekker made it to my list of awesome people after I finished this series.

6. In Defense of the Faith by Dave Hunt. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing this book was. Defending the faith is something all Christians should know how to do, and (next to the Bible of course) this is the handbook.

7. Start Here by Alex and Brett Harris. Not as good as Do Hard Things, but it still makes you think. A powerful books written for teens, by teens.

8. The Martyr's Song by Ted Dekker. Ted Dekker again, I know. The first book I read of his that wasn't in the Circle Trilogy. It had me hooked from the very beginning. If I remember correctly I even cried at one point. Not something I do to often.

So, one of my goals for 2011, read more books.

Writing Goals Rock

After finishing my NaNo novel for 2010 I was thrilled. In my opinion, it was my best project yet. I loved the characters. I loved the story line. I loved that fact that the first draft was finished. Yet, there is still so much more work to be done. I love it, but in all reality, it's 65k words of trash.

So begins second draft. Rewrites. 500 words into rewriting I discovered something. I have a love/hate relationship with doing it. I love taking a sentence from the original and turning it into something so much better. Telling the story in a clearer way. Adding scenes that I can't believe I forgot in the first draft. Scenes that reveal secrets you never would have believed were there.

At the same time however, is this ever going to end? Each word gets me closer to the end of draft two, each word makes for an even better novel, but for someone who's attention span is rather short lived, the whole thing is already becoming rather difficult.

I guess the best way to deal with that is to finish as soon as possible. Thus, I have set myself the goal of finishing draft two by June 1st. On top of that, I would like to keep working on Ash Valley (check out my new page, Current Writing Projects to read about Ash Valley). Maybe get the first draft finished?

Writing goals rock. 'Nuff said.

R. I. P. Bluejane

Here it is. A brand new blog to go with my brand new phase of life, and to accompany them both, a new name.

Georgianna Penn, aka Georgie. My pen name and the name I've decided to start introducing myself as such. In order to do so, old names must be put to rest.

We had a lot of laughs. A lot of deep thoughts (as deep as our thoughts can get at any rate). We've done a lot of pondering and friend seeking. We've said a lot of random things, and some things that only we could ever fully understand. R. I. P. Bluejane. I shall remember you fondly.

I would also like to say a fond farewell and hello to Narniagirl/Sky. The best thing about change is the people you do it with.

Time With Family

For the last three days we have been living in our motor home at our Grandparents house. It has been so nice to spend time with all my Grandparents before we leave, but it has also been really sad. One moment I’m really excited about going, and the next I don’t want to.

I guess I’ll just be thankful for the time God gives me with the people I care about, and then take His hand and let Him lead me where He needs me…. and try to trust Him while it happens.

As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the Lord is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him.

~ 2 Samuel 22:31